Sex, Lies and Fairy Tales

Sex, Lies and Fairy Tales but not in that order.  First came the Fairy Tales, then the Lies and next came Sex. Wait! That's wrong, too. I think the Lies came first, then the Fairy Tales and lastly, Sex.  Oh, what does the order of it matter? They all got me in trouble.

I like where I am now, except for one thing.  I'm old and now that I have finally figured life out, I'm taking my experiences, knowledge, insight and wisdom to the grave with me.  I'm living in the next to the last chapter of my life, and I don't have much time left to share what I've learned with my younger, much-loved descendants.

Actually, that's not true.  What I just wrote above, "Blah, blah, blah, blah blah." That's a lie. I'm constantly sharing the lessons I've learned from my life with anyone who will listen.  The problem is no one is. Listening, that is.  My ninety-four-year-old mother-in-law says it's because no one pays any attention to old people, but I never listen to her.  I feel that my treasure trove of insight and wisdom must be shared with those who are trailing behind me on the treadmill of life.  How can they possibly know what to do in any given situation if I don't tell them?  Don't you agree?  Hello?  Hello?  Is anyone there?