The Thing About Trust

Six was too good looking for his own well being. Women swooned over his movie-star looks and the attention made him uncomfortable. He often said he was not the man who women believed him to be, and he was right. His beautiful exterior was in stark contrast to what lie beneath the surface. Six was shy, unassuming, reserved, soft spoken, kind, thoughtful, and gentle.

When I first met Six, I was distracted by his looks, but after some time I discovered that he was a genuinely nice man who should marry my sister, Lynnette. I arranged a meeting, introduced them, and waited for the mutual attraction, which never happened. She was looking for a much younger Florida boy, and he was looking for someone not so gorgeous. Enter me. The not-so-gorgeous someone.

There was nothing to not like about Six, so I didn't. I liked it all. His beauty, his sweet nature, his desire to go slow so our relationship could grow to be strong and healthy. I was the first one to mention love. His mention of it came later, but at least I knew it was sincere when it did come. One year passed, then two, and three. The foundation of our mutual love and respect was rock solid by year four, the year we started talking about marriage. Maybe, at age forty-six, I had finally gotten this whole love thing right.

WRONG!

It was those damn good looks that got him in trouble. He wanted to say no, but Six was an accommodator, a people pleaser, and there were a lot of women out there who wanted pleasing. He was sorry, he said. It wouldn't happen again, he said. It was me he loved, he said. Would I not leave him? he asked. How could I go? He was my man. He had the power. And without it I was, well, you know.

Here's the thing about trust. Once it's been violated, it places every person, place and thing under suspicion. It has a million unanswered questions; it calls telephone numbers it doesn't recognize, and it does drive bys at two o'clock in the morning. Beware of a violated trust because if intuition says something is wrong, it will play detective, track down the truth, discover dirty little secrets, and then wait for just the right moment for the big reveal. Gotcha! again. But wait! Not so fast! What about the man? Gotta say nothing, do nothing; soldier on in silence in order to keep the man, right?

WRONG!

Here's the thing about violated trust. It just can't keep its big mouth shut.