Nine Reasons for Lying

How observant are you? Did you happen to notice in the prior post The Truth Is that there were ten people on the right side of the room but only nine people raised their hands when asked "Who among you never tells a lie?" That's me with the fly on my head. I didn't raise my hand because I'm a liar. But I only lie when the need arises. Otherwise, I have no problem telling the truth.

By my count, there are nine reasons for lying:

1. Cover Up: A cover up lie occurs when someone does (or does not do) something and they do not want others to know about it. This type of lie is not okay but sometimes is necessary when attempting to avoid very unpleasant consequences.

2. Impress Others: This type of lie occurs when someone feels they are inadequate just as they are, so they say things to give others the impression that they are more than adequate.  I'll write more about "impressing-others lies" when I return from my book tour that will take me around the world. This type of lie is okay if it helps the liar deal with their feelings of inadequacy. Like I said above, more about this when I return from my whirlwind around-the-world book tour. 

3. Spare Feelings: Sometimes lying is necessary when telling the truth hurts someone's feelings. This type of lie is okay. 

4. Avoid Consequences: Whatever the consequence might be that someone would feel the need to avoid it, lying is sometimes the only answer. This type of lie could swing either way: okay or not okay. 

5. Pathological: This is when a person feels the need to lie about pretty much everything. These types of lies could also swing either way, but really this person should not be held accountable for anything they say because they were not mentally-competent at the time of the lie.

6. Exaggerate the Facts: Bend the truth; stretch the truth. Who doesn't do that? Of course, it's okay. Let's move on.

7. Avoid Unpleasant Events or Situations: This is where most of the lies people tell fall: the need to avoid unpleasant events. I'm gonna say this type of lie is okay just because I do it all the time, and I don't want to feel bad about it.

8. Altruistic: This is when someone lies for no gain of their own. They are selfless individuals who lie to help others. I don't know anyone who would do this, but I suppose it's okay--on rare occasions--unless it involves spending time in jail.

9. Manipulation: This is when someone manipulates the truth for their own gain.  I've known people like this, and I'm going to say these lies are not okay for any reason.

There are times when a single lie can encompass more than one of the above nine reasons for lying. For example, a Cover Up can cross over into Spare Feelings and then move on to Avoid Consequences before stopping at Avoid Unpleasant Events or Situations.

Cover Up, Spare Feelings,

Avoid Consequences,

Avoid Unpleasant Events/Situations