Hindsight By My Side

I lied to my mother and Hazel constantly as a little girl growing up in a restrictive world with too many no's--"No! You can't go to the sock hop. Nope! No movies.  No bowling either. No this. No that. No! No! No! No! No!" There were times when I questioned the "No's,"  and the response was always, "Because it's against our religion." But when I pushed harder and asked for a reason, a good explanation why I was shut off from the world, the hammer came down and stopped my inquisition. "BECAUSE I SAID SO!!" Hazel would say and then she would go for the switch that she kept on top of the refrigeration.  As I saw it, there was only one thing left for me to do: lie.

Time marches on and things, they were a'changing. The church relaxed its restrictive rules. Hazel was replaced by Prince Charming who rescued Mother and her two daughters. He carried us off to the suburbs, and the need to lie was diminished, but not gone completely. There was still one person left who couldn't handle the truth. And so, there was only one thing left for me to do: lie.

I hate to lie. Well, I don't hate it; I just dislike it immensely. With each lie comes a little piece of guilt. Over the years, each piece gets added to the last and before you know it, there's a whole trash bin full of guilt. It's heavy and, like all trash, it stinks. And you have to remember where each piece is because you might be asked to pull it out of the trash bin and tell it again.

There was a time, as a young adult, when I said, "I'm done with lying. No more lying. Lying be gone." I was tired of hauling around my trash bin of guilt. So to be free of guilt, there was only one thing left for me to do: Go forward with the truth. Nothing but the truth.

Once I made the decision to never tell another lie as long as I lived, I felt liberated. Telling the truth sets you free, right?

WRONG! NAH! NOPE! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!

Who came up with that stupid saying, anyway? How about these sayings:

The truth will get you in trouble.

The truth will make you unpopular with people.

(Dogs and cats? They don't care, either way

they still like you.)

The truth will reduce your friend count drastically.

The truth will set you free in a world with one person: you.

The truth will make you think twice about telling the truth.

Mother can't handle the truth.

I'm old now and with Hindsight by my side, I can see clearly now--well, that's actually a lie; the computer screen is a blur and Hindsight is taking a nap. Regarding what I said above about always telling the truth...

Never mind.