Choose Good

At first, I was skeptical of my new dad. I kept wondering when his true agenda would reveal itself. When was his "kind and nice" going to be replaced by something more "authoritative and mean." The transformation never came. As time passed I began to soften to his gentle approach and genuine interest in his youngest step daughter. I don't know when it happened, but some time after my little sister came along, Orville became "Dad."

What I understand now that I didn't "get" back then was his need (it was a need not a desire) to share his life's experiences and lessons learned with his loved ones traveling on the path behind him in life. If we listened to him, he could save us from the potholes in our path, thereby reducing our pain and suffering in life. There were times when the two of us would sit at the kitchen table while he would go on and on about things of no interest to me. I listened some of the time, but most of the time my mind was somewhere else. His message was lost on me then, yet now, all these many years later, I can still hear him say, "Always remember when you have a choice between good and evil, choose good." At the time, I thought it was a simplistic, ridiculous thing to say. Duh! Pick good, not evil; everyone knows that. But the path in life is not simple; it's often ridiculous, and it's littered with evil, some of our own doing, which in turn causes pain and suffering. 

I grew to love my dad very much. His love for me was constant, unconditional, and sometimes even desperate. (I ran away from home once, and when he finally found me, he was crying like a baby.)  I didn't have to draw pretty pictures to get his praise. I didn't have to be beautiful to earn his admiration. I just had to be me; that was good enough for him.

His demeanor was straight forward, gentle, genuine, and simple. He was one of the best men I have ever known. If only I could sit down with him at the kitchen table one more time, I would say, "I get it now, Dad; thanks for sharing; thanks for caring enough to want to save me from the potholes in life." 

I loved that man with all my heart and I miss him terribly.