The Perfect Irony

You know how, when you hear someone profess one thing but do the opposite, you feel a nagging urge to say something? You know how, when you're witnessing the perfect irony, you get excited and want to share it with everyone around you at the very moment it's happening? You know how, when you act on those impulses--perfect ironies don't come around that often--you can become the center of unwanted attention? You know how, when everyone is staring at you, you wish you had kept your big mouth shut? No? That's never happened to you because you always think before you speak? Well, aren't you special.

In the spring of 1989 Thomson University hired a very

expensive, self-proclaimed expert on how to achieve

perfection in the workplace. I was at that lecture. It should

have been called "How to Achieve the Perfect Irony."