Don't Raise the Flag

If you have me on a list of people you send cards to for such events as birthdays or Christmas, let me make your life a little easier. If you are going to let some stranger at a card factory who does not know me write a sappy, rhyming, out-of-touch-with-reality message for you and all you do is sign your name, then don't bother. Save the cost of the card. Save your stamp. Save your saliva. Don't walk out to your mailbox and don't raise the flag. If you can't think of a few words to jot down to show me your heart and focus on me are also included in the card-sending tradition, then don't bother.

Oh, now I've upset you. I'm really sorry about that but someone needs to tell you about your lack of good etiquette and proper behavior in the social arena.

What? What do you mean I didn't acknowledge your birthday yesterday? Didn't you get my "Hp u hav a gd BD" text?