Mom's Story-Hypoxia

(Mom's Story-Hypoxia is a continuation from July 23.)

Her expression was one of urgency when she motioned for me to come closer. She was sitting up in her hospital bed at Whitehall Rehab Center when Tom and I centered her room, and she had something important on her mind.  She was no longer suffering from pneumonia, but her breathing was still labored even though she was connected to oxygen.

"I saw you in the car with him and those five white puppies," she said. "What white puppies?" Tom asked. "Never mind," she told him. Then she leaned closer to me and whispered, "It's okay. I won't tell anyone. We women have our secrets. I'll keep yours." I smiled and told my mother-in-law that I appreciated her discretion.

Later that afternoon, during a visit to Dr. Johnson, she came very close to leaving his office with her driving privilege intact. At ninety-four, she was a good driver and there was little thought given to her ability to live alone, handle her own affairs, and drive anywhere she pleased. But then all of that changed when, at the very end of her appointment when the doctor stood up to leave, she said, "So Dr. Johnson,  how long have you been practicing in Boca Raton? For the last seven years, I've been driving to Indianapolis to see you." Oops!

Now no longer able to live alone or drive, life as Mom had known it for nine decades was changed in an instant. The lack of oxygen to the brain had created a condition called hypoxia, and hypoxia was responsible for my affair with the man who kept five white puppies in his car and Dr. Johnson's move from Indy to Boca. Hypoxia was the reason why Mom could not go home and back to independence.

As the four of us (Mom's two sons and daughters-in-law) hurried to find an apartment in an assisted living facility, one topic of conversation continued to surface. "Had we been remiss in allowing Mom to live alone and drive as long has she had? Had we stuck our heads in the sand because we didn't want to face the consequences from taking away a loved one's independence?" There had been signs that all was not well before she was rushed to the emergency room with pneumonia and spent close to a month in rehab. Bill, her late husband, had made several unwelcome visits to see her, and he always brought along his new girlfriend. The rowdy children who kept running through her house were annoying. And the man across the street had installed a soundbox in her living room so she could hear his golf cart whenever he drove around her house. Should we have taken those hypoxia-induced hallucinations more seriously? Had she been safe on the road? What if she'd caused an accident that had harmed herself and others or, God forbid, killed someone?

We were lucky. Very lucky, but Mom is not buying it--none of it!! She is perfectly capable of taking care of herself, and she is going to continue driving!

Mom's story to be continued